Monty Navarro (Montaldo D’Ysquith Navarro): The charming and cunning protagonist. Upon discovering he’s ninth in line to inherit the D’Ysquith family fortune, Monty sets out to eliminate the eight heirs before him. Both a romantic and an ambitious social climber.
Sibella Hallward: Monty’s clever and beautiful love interest. She initially rejects Monty due to his lack of wealth, but keeps him close even after marrying another man. She’s witty, vain, and manipulative.
Phoebe D’Ysquith: A kind-hearted and genuinely loving young woman who is Monty’s cousin (but distantly enough to be a love interest). She represents Monty’s more innocent and sincere romantic option.
The D’Ysquith Family Members (All Played by One Actor): Each of these relatives stands between Monty and the earldom, and each meets a creatively untimely end.
- Lord Adalbert D’Ysquith – The current Earl of Highhurst. Pompous, bigoted, and obsessed with status.
- Asquith D’Ysquith Jr. – A womanizing playboy.
- Asquith D’Ysquith Sr. – A stodgy banker, indifferent to Monty’s pleas for help.
- Reverend Lord Ezekial D’Ysquith – A doddering, elderly clergyman.
- Lord Bartholomew D’Ysquith – A fitness fanatic obsessed with his physique.
- Lady Salome D’Ysquith Pumphrey – A terrible actress with delusions of grandeur.
- Henry D’Ysquith – A sweet, eccentric, and possibly closeted bee enthusiast.
- Lady Hyacinth D’Ysquith – A do-gooder socialite who travels to dangerous places in the name of charity.
Miss Shingle: A mysterious old woman who reveals Monty’s connection to the D’Ysquith family and sets the plot in motion. She’s slightly eerie but ultimately helpful.
Chief Inspector Pinckney: The detective investigating the deaths of the D’Ysquith family members. Appears more prominently later in the show.
Ensemble: These performers play the chorus––servants, townspeople, party guests, jurors, police, etc.—often with quick costume and character changes.
Written with the use of ChatGPT
